Responsibilities and Money

We live in a time when many wedding etiquette and responsibilities are often used in a more relaxed way. Many couples often pay for most of their wedding expenses, rather than the bride and groom's parents handling most of the expenses. Another example is the traditional attendant's for the bride and groom. In the past a bride would never have a male attendant, or the groom have a female attendant. These traditions have not been relaxed.

There are many couples that have strong feelings about having a traditional wedding, and following time honored traditional roles and responsibly. Here is a list and duties and expectations for the wedding party and the parent's of the bride and groom. Remember, this does not mean you cannot do things your own way.

The Bride

Personally handles the Thank you notes
Guest book and pen
Gifts for her attendants
Her own medical examination and blood tests
A gift for the groom
The groom's wedding band
Beauty appointments for her attendants and herself

The Groom

His wedding attire
The bride's engagement ring and wedding band
Gift's for his attendants
The marriage license
His medical examination and blood tests
A present for the bride
The bridal bouquet and corsages for the mothers
All boutonnieres for the ushers, fathers and himself
Accessories for his attendant's (ties, etc.), not including formal wear
All honeymoon costs

The Bride's Family

Engagement party
Bridal dress, veil, going-away outfit
Music/soloist for church and reception
All photography
Wedding invitations
Church rental or location rental
Flowers for decorations and bridesmaid's bouquets (not the bride's)
All reception expenses (catering, decorations, wedding cake, beverages, tips and gratuities to staff, etc. - however, sometimes the groom's family will opt to pay for the beverages)
Transportation to and from the church to the reception
Their own wedding clothes
Any newspaper notices

The Groom's Family

Traveling expenses for themselves and the groom if needed
Wedding present for the bride and groom (often a donation of money to help with expenses)
Their own wedding clothes
The rehearsal dinner
All beverages at reception (optional, as noted above)

The Maid (Matron) of Honor

Pays for her wedding attire
Plans a shower for the bride or a party for the couple
Assists the bride on the wedding day
Is in charge of the guest book
Attends the wedding rehearsal
Signs the wedding certificate as a witness
Buys a wedding present for the couple
Makes sure the bride's going-away outfit is taken to the reception
Pays for her own travel and accommodations (if necessary)

The Best Man

Pays for his own wedding attire
Pays for his own travel and accommodations (if necessary)
Buys a gift for the wedding couple
Helps the groom with honeymoon arrangements
Decorates the car(s) (either with help from the groom or the ushers)
Makes sure the groom's going away outfit is taken to the reception
Attends the wedding rehearsal
Usually plans the bachelor party for the groom with the ushers

The Bridesmaids

Pay for their own wedding attire
Pay for their own travel and accommodations (if necessary)
Decorate for the reception and help to clean up afterward
Attend the wedding rehearsal
Gather up gifts and cards brought to the wedding and reception
Often, they plan a "bachelorette" party for the bride a week or two before the wedding
Either separately or as a group, buy a wedding gift for the couple

The Ushers

Pay for their own wedding attire
Pay for their own travel expenses and accommodations (if necessary)
Drive any guests that don't have transportation to the wedding and reception
Help to seat guests at the wedding
Either separately or as a group, buy a wedding gift for the couple

Flower Girl

Her parents pay for an appropriate outfit
Must attend the rehearsal
Walks in front of the bride in the processional
Walks behind the bride and groom in the recessional
Does not stand in the receiving line

Ring Bearer

Parent's pay for his wedding attire
Carries the ring(s) which are securely tied to a pillow (often, the best man will hold the real rings and two fake rings are placed on the pillow)
Attends the rehearsal
Proceeds the flower girl in the processional (or can walk with her)
Walks with the flower girl behind the bride and groom during the recessional
Does not stand in the receiving line


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Responsibilities and Money